providential

its a weird me,
that hovers thoughts of history.
i am still submerged in times we just shared,
days ago.
surprises sprung out from my emotions,
closely knitted is you to my views.
how every male seem so small after i gave my heart to you,
speechless.
to cook for you,
tidy up for you.
a magnetize workout,
i am complain-free.
making gifts for you,
creating laughter with you.

captivating,
boundless happiness.
simple,but grateful.
how can god dote me this way,
raise me high in spirits.
but still tie me with an undescribable hollowness.

but,no doubt,
i am satisfied.
felicitous me,
and a blessed you.





yc

skin

my brain is like a computer,
always,a new folder will be created by you.
and its ever so pleasant to look back,
its a nice feeling to know i'm not the only one trying.
thanks for being here,
letting me feel the warmth of your body.
re-igniting the flame i carry,
looking into a better tomorrow.

my foot seems so heavy when i'm departuring your side,
all the time.
even after hours,i can still sense the bear,
proving me what my heart has failed.
you're like a thesaurus to me,
never fail to find an engaging description for you.
be it funny,unique,weird,
lost and clueless.
because of you,
i have lost my stand,
whatever i put in words don't stand anymore.
like what i awkwardly told you.

dawn within,
remittance of my blessings.
tantalizing recaptures,
drooling for you.
everyone is ostracized by my blood pumper,
making you unique.

as you were complimented.




yc

Corrine May - An angel in Disguise

I woke up this morning feeling kind of blue
and I stumbled out of bed and
dragged my feet across the room
Right outside my front door was a rose
and a note that said 'Somebody Loves You'

Oh~ But out on the street it starts to pour
and before I get soaking wet,
A total stranger runs to give me
the jacket off his back
I turn around to thank him
But he waves me with a smile
And I can hardly believe my eyes
He puts on a halo and starts to fly

Take a look at the ordinary
Don't need to look for Paradise
You could be next to
an angel in disguise

I met a good friend for lunch
and we had a delicious meal
But I forgot to bring my wallet
I felt like an imbecile
But she was sweet, she gave me a treat and
Bought me a chicken sandwich
To take home for tea

Oh~ But out on the street with nothing to eat
A man and his shopping cart go
Travelling to places
Collecting social graces
I give him my sandwich
and we chatter for a while
I see a rainbow wash over his eyes
He gives me his halo and
I start to fly

Take a look at the ordinary
Don't need to look for Paradise
You could be next to
an angel in disguise

Don't try to hide away from me
I know you're by my side

Oooh~~

Take a look at the ordinary
Don't need to look at Paradise
You could be next to
an angel in disguise
Everyday can be legendary
Every minute, an endless surprise
You could be the next angel in disguise

I woke up this morning
Feeling kind of new

Corrine May - All that i need

I'm sorry that I hurt you
I took for granted all you gave so freely to me
I prayed it's not too late
To save you from a broken heart
To promise you I'll make a brand new start
Believe me when i say

You are all that I need
The only treasure I see
You're the air that helps me breathe
through the darkest night
When I fall down on my knees
I was blind but now I see
You are all that I need

When no one far from perfect
Like a child that needs a guiding hand
Can you stay here with me
I finally understand
You've always been the missing part
Complete the jigsaw puzzle of my heart
Please hear me when i say

You are all that I need
The only treasure I see
You're the air that helps me breathe
through the darkest night
When I fall down on my knees
I was blind but now I see
You are all that I need

Please let me hear your voice again
Let me hear you say your love will never end
That whatever it takes you'll be there
When I say

You are all that I need
The only treasure I see
You're the air that helps me breathe
through the darkest night
When I fall down on my knees
I was blind but now I see
You are all that I need
You are all that I need...

the relationship woes

喜欢一个人应该是在明。。。勇敢的说。。。就算被拒绝也必须大胆的面对。

一段感情如果在暗，两个人需要多少的勇气才能够一步一步的往前走?

一段感情的开始和结束，无论如何，都算是缘分，如果有了缘分，勇气就必定的武器向前冲。。

如果真的缺乏勇气的话，就必须问一下自己，这份缘分对你有多重要。


你，流泪了，痛了, 如果选择继续走下去的话 也是一种勇气! 加油!!!



(from Melissa's friend)


yc

potpurri

i have learn to accept,
to don't request.
to smile,
not frown.
to be positive,
not negative.

thanks for coming into my life,
making realize so many things that i thought i couldn't stand.
upgrading my mentality,
changing my life.
i am more vast than i originally presume,
you are so much more influential than you thought.







yc

chord

if i can take an intimate photo with you and post it,
it meant god really love me.
if you can hold my hand in public,
cupid's definitely present.
there is no impede to my imagination and dread,
my fractured heart.

in a flutter,it has been months since i become dull-witted.
this envy of others is so ferocious,
my life,circumscribed.
now,a protuberance emotion is stuck in my throat.
i have lost the ability to speech,
i should blind myself from the image of blissful wanderers in my life.

i keep lying to myself,
to keep myself calm,away from tempestuous.
the invitation is widely scattered for you,
would you turn up,to my cocktail party.
vibrant colors,well organized.
i'm now a prisoner in a cell with no boundaries,
loyally guarding to a belief that has not yet been affirmed.

please do not disseminate your love,
even as a chum,i'll have no complain.







yc

thank you.

haven't anyone wonder how easy it is to be really happy?
whenever i feel dejected,
i'll goon facebook and see pictures.
joy's pictures in aussie always make me see how easy it is to laugh,
your pictures satisfy my constant craving for you.

life,really.
its all about a thought,
a single connection of the right nerve.
the ability to view things right.

and to have this mentality,
i really need to thank god for making people love me.
my family,
they never burden with stress.
but flood my world with love,
energy for everything i do.
pamper me with whatever i want,
making sure a smile is always posted on my face.
they never hold me responsible for anything,
i cannot imagine living in this world without them.
often,
bitter strikes them.
but they always frost it with sugar,
before they serve anything to me.

to smile,we need love.
and only love,can make me smile.






yc

scant

crescent am the moon,
bright is the sun.
green is the wood,
clear is the sea water.
blue am the sky,
cottony is the clouds.

hot is the coffee by my side,
deliciously warm is the muffin on my plate.
on this early morning,
a fine read,a good shower.

i wonder who's sleeping,
who's woeing.
who's frustrated,
who's elated.
who's stressed out,
who's laid back.

a pat on my obedient puppy,
who is eyeing on my scramble egg.
the simplicity of its wants,
the thought of you.
true enough,
there is alot of things i want,
but i know i'm willing to give them up.
in exchange for just you,
my very simple need.

running the leaves of the purple cabbage under the tap,
i remember how you once describe its bite.
crisp,satisfying.
i sent a piece into my mouth,
savouring its sweetness,the texture.
sweetness,with eyes closed,
its how you influence me,
taste to mental.

boiling on my stove,
a very spicy tom yam soup.
a sip is all i need to put me down,
spiciness,not my deal.
the reason why sometimes i still drink,
because it links.
how you would finish it,
i think.

a pleasant start to my day,
a kind brood.
my perfect day,
my fookiebie life.




yc

everyday

life,painted with colors.
easily tainted,
muddle within influences.
looking for answers,
but left clueless.
cerebrating amongst possibilities,
concluding an unknown and changeable definition.

life,filled with lots of passion.
loaded with care,
the happy sharing of blessings.
the effortless smiles,
the crane that lift moodiness.
spillage of human's unwanted pessimism,
setting brand new sunrise.

skies blue,
forests green.
fruits and vegetables keep us healthy.







yc

routinized work of nature

as long as i have you,
nothing matters.
the sunlight for me,
like a withered plant,my heart.

my feelings,
like water.
splashing for you.

together,
revive the bent flower.
struggling to live...

but one day it'll blossom.
beautiful,once again.




yc

blamelessness

i hate my job,
but i know i need it.
i hate myself for being so weak,
but that's why i know i'm still a little girl.

indeed,
i'm a little girl.
a girl that doesn't know what life has to offer,
what love cant offer me all the time.

frolicking among queries,
indefinite answers.
reality is a far cry from dreams,
why cant dreams be translated to reality.
led astray by my exigency,
i pound on fragility.






yc

peculiar

different,its different.
i couldn't decipher it,
this weird code cupid has set for me.
the differentiation,
this feeling.

i don't want to try anymore,
i'm freaking out from my actions.
no one's like you.
you can never understand why its hard,
my heart,the stability it has.

roses with thorns,
my perspective on love.
since i never knew how to confide to anyone,
i'll let this prickly feeling haunt me.

i'll give up trying,
nothing works.
you're different,
i know.




yc







yc

rolling blesses

if i have an angel,
i would love her to bless you.
to give u happiness,to give you jovial.

if my angel dote on me,
she will bring you to me.
to grant my selfish possession of you,
to make our ends meet.

angels everywhere,
blessings all around.
make our spirits high,
so we sing out loud.
this emotions dwell within,
sometimes beautiful,sometimes grisly.

if only i can wake and sleep with you,
to wait for you,to chat with you.
to send you off to practice,
to send you a kiss anytime.

captivation.





yc

cosmos

i went climbing,
close to trees,flowers,rocks,nature.
leaning in to the tree bark,
listening.
kissing flowers,
touching the rock.
allowing streams to run through my feet,
trying to understand nature.
trying to untangle my complicated emotions,
peace,calmness.

only when we learn to quiet down,
embrace this mother.
the soothing feeling,
makes everywhere the best place.

i'm eager to travel again,
to see more.
to incorporate more of what nature can give into my brain,
wealthy soul, a satisfaction.
life experiences,some linger,some just flash past.
how should i gauge you?
my life that has you.

easy,just carry on the fancy i have for you.





yc

panoply

i did what you want me to do,
to go out with potential dates.
just informing,
but all's too bad.
i talked,joked,laugh with them,
but so frank am my feelings.
no,definitely not these people,
the parade of my dancing heart.
i don't know what is the vibe about you,
ticklish,funny.
that never fails to light my day,
make me smile.
until the time is ripe,
this is how u reward me for liking you.







yc

befuddle

I'm sitting by malacca river,
2am,legs dipped beneath the the dark water.
with dimly lit street lamp,
ripples created by my feet.
i was thinking to myself,
if you'll join me on another trip like this.

i'm not afraid of the dark,
not even worried by the danger of wee hours.
my brain,fulfilling its daily dosage of you.
because i have no fear of your rejection,
i noticed that i'm fearless.

what if i were to fall into the river and drown?
what if a hand just grab my leg down.
what if a rapist turn up.
what should i do when i felt like messaging you?
what if you're by the side of the girl you fancy.
what did u have for dinner?
all these questions and answer.
and eventually,
boils down again.
what makes me think i'm good enough for you.
then i got depressed,
and i fall asleep... ... ...

then he came and woke me up,
i had a drop too much,always,when i loses direction from my heart.
with my flops dangling from my finger,
i studded back to the hotel.
turning around,looking back at the spot i comfortably held base for hours.
in this unfamiliar land,
i wonder how ridiculous and weird i am.







yc

tea

a cuppa tea in my hand,
under the sun.
viewing the garden,
watching the birds fly past.
as i slowly flip open the book,
the key to my inner thoughts.
my pen and notebook already prepared by the table,
any new literal will be noted immediately.

taking some time off work and love.
truely understand the privacy.
meddling with words,
breathing in fresh oxygen.
taking some time off from you,
planning my dinner.
listing my grocery list.
the most beautiful thing in life,
is everywhere within our grasp.
just like me,
whenever i need a rainbow to light my spirit,
i fetch the image in front of me myself.
make rainbow with the hose,under the sun.
and that's the wonder of taking a seat,
and enjoying a cuppa tea.
you don't need prayers to calm your tense,
but you definitely need quiet time.
time to be back to nature,
to the fundamental enjoyment of non-electrical appliances.

this simple activity never fails to make me understand so many things.
so much,that its hard to put it in words.
the charm of simple things,
how wonderful.
always set me straight,
towards my target,my love,my family.

now,whenever i do this,
i feel blessed.
in a very different way..
so loaded is the pump.







yc

silly

call me silly,
as i'm the silly little girl.
always doing the wrong stuff,
always sending people fretting for me.
always stoning,
always need awakening.

call me silly,
for i always act stubbornly.
for i always forget to take care of myself.
for i always like to provoke you.
for i always fail to make your day.

call me silly.
because i love it when you are the one pointing me out.







yc

regal

the weird relationship between females and food.
the ballooning effect happening in reality,
big and small.
buffed and tiny.
fat and skinny.
popular or mocks.
enjoying and regretting.
complimented and commented.

eventually,death.
overall,that's how things work.
for the emotionally dignified.






yc

orgy

so,its that easy.
that easy to let me go.
this grueling crumple up of emotions,
coagulating.
today,my firm heart quakes.
by this pain,this sense of disclosure.
in broad daylight,my watery eyes.
please,god.
let me hide.

you have never once complimented me,
have you notice that?
itz always actions that i self pacify myself.
the option to blind myself,
the choice to keep on being happy and delighted.
free as a bird,
you don't belong to me.
no one owns you,
only your heart.

am i that bad?
i wonder to myself.
is there something about me that actually makes you smile...
so i am not that wonderful as i presume myself to be,
or i tried portraying.
today,i'm overshadowed.
by slums,piles of reality weight upon my shoulders.
yes,you and me,not that happy.
maybe i should conclude within myself that i'm not that good.
not good enough for anybody,
for myself even.

as i sunk myself into the embrace of food,
the binge-eating.
i still helplessly sought for comfort.
yet all i see in the mirror now,
is a loser.
a pessimist piling on the pounds,
and eventually swim in my own swirling pool.
round and round,
about and about.
food digest,
like feelings.
one day i shall find the routine to discard it.

for this feeling that's troubling me,
i have no idea how to deal.
some sleep will help,
if i can.
and hopefully my dreams don't fail me with your images,
so i don't wake up hovering amongst again.

maybe i'm meant to be alone.
and alone shall be until the defining day comes.









yc