fingers clenched

For 2 person to come together...

they need to meet at the right time,

think the right way

live at the right place

hold the right job

love the right stuff

compromise the right way

be at each other's side the right moment

abundant too many "right", just to bump and spark the adoration.

thus, if you are sleeping next to someone whom you already shared a pair of wedding band with.

congrats!

for nature has done her outmost acomodation to give you the right one

so now, please do the rightful thing and cherish them.

for this sort of blessing doesn't come easy...

and blessing like this isn't showered on anyone.



yc

escarpment

you embrace me with such strength,
my head tilted back.

my eyes swelled.
tears collected swiftly flows,
creating a stream down my cheek.

it is this moment,
i knew its okay to be weak.
and it is also this moment,
i have to be strong...

i recite to myself,
the fact, that one day ,you might leave me.

and if you really do,
i knew i would not have been killed that instantly.

i am sorry if i chose not to trust you,
but it is safer within my boundaries.

for all the frightening shiver i had survived,
for all the scars sinked into my heart & soul....

for all those experiences...
i will not trust you,
forgive me so.






yc

love & its powers

do you know what happens if you're too much in love with someone?
love, this very strong and special feeling.
possess positive power,
that can be too deadly too.

love,
once lost....

can make you suicidal,
you cant take the thought that one day you will live without this person whom you love.
who made up your life.

it'll make you suicidal,
becauese the world will look freaking distorted.
the unfairness you felt...
bitter like poison.

it'll make you suicidal,
for food,something to sustain our life.
becomes repulsive.
where all our appetite melts & evaporates.

it'll make you suicidal,
because you turn into a loser in an instant.
you would find no energy and attention to keep up with your appearance.
for he once love this physicality of you...
but now he turned his back.
what reason or excuse can you fetch,
to look into the mirror.

it'll make you suicidal,
because you're afraid of the radio.
you are constantly tensed with the begining of every song,
worried,
it was that song that you both once sing & hum together.

it'll make you suicidal,
because you cant take the sight of happiness squandered by strangers.
because laughter becomes an annoyance.

it'll make you suicidal,
because your heart aches so much...so intensely...
every breath is so straining,
every blink of the eyes purged with the drowning of tears...

love,
Powerful.
be it positive or negative.
good & evil.

and i have lost the correct grip to handle this grasp properly.





yc

~splashes~

~splash~

and here i am,
down into this pool.
surrounded by water,
my hair has lost its gravity.
my nose shutted.
my eyes wide open,
and blurry i see.

i look up,
left and right.
my heart, a sense of relieve.
i felt as if all these pain will end in no time.

i am engulfed in flames of grief,
afflicted is my soul.
my spirit is drunk,
from the abuse of you,
intoxication of you.
in my mind,constantly...all the time.

yes,
indeed i drank.
alcohol...
makes me irrational enough to think rational.
alcohol,
gives me the courage to spill my bleeding heart.
alcohol,
gives me the push to enter this pool.

in an instant,
my heart becomes dumb.
i became dumb.

my heart,
i am preoccupied with bidding many silent good byes to my loved ones.

my heart, for it,
i became this speechless draining soul,
as water slowy takes up my lungs, jaws ajar....

my swollen & tired eyes,
my silenced breathing.....

good bye all...
i am through with this torment.





yc

my life characters

it is a dream,
must be a dream...

please wake up silly girl,
the love will tarnish your life as before.
please remember you harbour the weird attributes of being abused mentally.
you cannot attain anything related to LOVE.
and thus for goodness sake,
stop seeking it like an idiot frolicking amonst playful & bored men.

it is a dream formed by reality.
better to wake,
or till death you sleep in deceive.



yc