the weeper

sometimes,
i really admire.
admire girls that can cry in front of the public,
pouring their sorrows out.
getting embraces that will calm their souls,
speaking of their sadness to whoever is present.
because,i am someone that will never show my weakness to anyone,
i will always feign a smile to calm people.
i cannot tolerate the thought of people viewing me as a weak little girl,
or so,indeed, i am.
although i have tried my best,
but confidence is built upon how people view me.
and not the way i thought i portrayed.
today,i sat opposite the weeping lady that found out her boyfriend cheated on her,
i was speechless.
for i knew nothing could help her,
not even her own tears and words.
but the moment in life,
as i was.
i don't know how long she'll cry,
but i pray she don't drain into my life.
the one year that i almost ruined myself,my faith and my family.

what can i tell her,
i run through my thoughts.
nothing came out,
asking me to relinquish that painful memories isn't promising.
i have forgotten so much in such a short time,
everything is a blur now.
there is no dread.


yc