bollix

as i was fumbling through my thoughts,
i realize that i have very few best friends where i can hang around most of my time.
it ain't bout them i deduce,
its about how i react to this femininity affection.
my disgusted character of preserving too much time into self-thinking,
or probably self-ascertain.
i have zero idea!

too bad am i living in this world of too many friendships running around,everywhere.
i choose the path of reluctance.
my mind is whirled in a way,and i'm clueless.
today was an eventful day for me and yet i felt hollow end of the day.
it may be the consequence of too much hidden inquiries and answers,
i failed my yearly resolution yet again.

to chose a quiet spot to hide,i reckon.
waiting for the chance.
bound within me is fear i have yet not conclude,
and i'm waiting for the chance to face it.

the whole world is a cupboard of jokes,
a library of words.
a pile of rubbish?

if i'm dwelled in comparison,
then i'm a sad little creature living in this beautiful painting.
so what choices have i got?
marching towards more experiences,
improvement.

i'm marked.

yc